Saturday, February 14, 2009
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Marriage in the Temple
I just want to tell you a little bit about how to handle things when you decide to get married. There are some things that need to be done ahead of the wedding day.
- You will need to call the Temple for an appointment. The earlier you call the better chance you have of getting the day and hour you would like.
- You can request a particular size room so all your guests will have a seat. The rooms are not large, so you should carefully limit your guest list to family and very close friends.
- You can request a particular sealer if you wish to. That request should be made to the temple when you call, and also to the particular sealer you have chosen plenty early for him to schedule and to get permission if he needs to. General Authorities can seal in any temple. Regular sealers, or sealers who are retired from regular sealing, are assigned to only one temple. They can seal direct descendents in any temple but must receive permission from the First Presidency to do so - and that takes a little time to get letters back and forth.
- You will, of course, spend a good deal of time with what to wear. Please be sure you dress as recommended and that you school your desires and feelings, your attitude, to be in tune with that - so you feel good about it. If you come to the temple feeling excited for this wonderful opportunity, and willing and anxious in every way to to be ready for this experience, you will feel the Spirit there and leave with wonderful feelings inside, and ready to face the world together.
This is just a thought or two I've had as I've observed things at the Temple.
The Lord and me - and you.
I’ve tried to imagine, and can’t really, the great wisdom, power and majesty of the Lord in His dealings with us. Or perhaps I should say, in the way I have come to believe He deals with us.
This is kind of where I’ve come to in my feelings about that:
We know we are here on the Earth because we wanted to be like our Father in Heaven; that is, to have a physical body and to prepare it so it would be in a condition that would allow us to take it back with us to the condition He lives in – to be like Him, and have the freedoms and wisdom and power that He has acquired. We wanted to have an eternal companion and family, like He does. We wanted to be like He is and do as He does.
We chose to come here. There are those who chose not to come. I don’t know exactly how they went about making that choice, although I doubt it was their goal to not come here, to not have a body, to not have a family, to not be like our Father. I imagine they were told, and somehow believed, it would work the way they wanted it to, and they would be the ones who would be here. But, in the wonderful, fair, freedom of choice, majestic process that took place there, we all made our choice – and they chose not to come – and they lost everything, and they have come to hate us, are now trying really hard to keep us from getting back there. And they have drummed up plenty of people who did choose to come who are helping them do it. Some of them pose as our friends.
We chose to come. The scriptures tell us that we rejoiced to come. That suggests to me that we were pretty confident we could make it back. We at least wanted the chance to try. I suppose we each had our own feelings and reasons and such. There were probably those who were humbly uncertain but felt if the Lord would help them along, as He promised He would, they could maybe make it. On the other end of things, there might have been those who proudly felt they wouldn’t have any problem – ‘just hurry and get me down there and I’ll be back in great shape’. And everything in between.
The Lord is helping us, every one of us, every person born on the earth, in every possible way. Sometimes He helps us directly. More often He helps us through our parents and other people. We know some things about that and I believe it suggests a number of things.
This is kind of where I’ve come to in my feelings about that:
We know we are here on the Earth because we wanted to be like our Father in Heaven; that is, to have a physical body and to prepare it so it would be in a condition that would allow us to take it back with us to the condition He lives in – to be like Him, and have the freedoms and wisdom and power that He has acquired. We wanted to have an eternal companion and family, like He does. We wanted to be like He is and do as He does.
We chose to come here. There are those who chose not to come. I don’t know exactly how they went about making that choice, although I doubt it was their goal to not come here, to not have a body, to not have a family, to not be like our Father. I imagine they were told, and somehow believed, it would work the way they wanted it to, and they would be the ones who would be here. But, in the wonderful, fair, freedom of choice, majestic process that took place there, we all made our choice – and they chose not to come – and they lost everything, and they have come to hate us, are now trying really hard to keep us from getting back there. And they have drummed up plenty of people who did choose to come who are helping them do it. Some of them pose as our friends.
We chose to come. The scriptures tell us that we rejoiced to come. That suggests to me that we were pretty confident we could make it back. We at least wanted the chance to try. I suppose we each had our own feelings and reasons and such. There were probably those who were humbly uncertain but felt if the Lord would help them along, as He promised He would, they could maybe make it. On the other end of things, there might have been those who proudly felt they wouldn’t have any problem – ‘just hurry and get me down there and I’ll be back in great shape’. And everything in between.
The Lord is helping us, every one of us, every person born on the earth, in every possible way. Sometimes He helps us directly. More often He helps us through our parents and other people. We know some things about that and I believe it suggests a number of things.
- For example: Every person born on the Earth is blessed with the ‘Spirit of Christ’, and is thereby taught truths and is led if he/she will allow it.
- Everyone ‘knows’ right from wrong.
- Everyone ‘knows’ and recognizes the basic truths of the Lords Plan. Consider how, after centuries since the true gospel has been taught, and in spite of being taught false concepts, people ‘recognize’ or ‘remember’ the fundamental truths – what the Lord is like, what we’ll be like after we die, life didn’t begin at our birth, how we should live and treat each other, etc.
- Everyone, worldwide, receives answers to his/her prayers. Some people recognize that and respond, others ignore or deny it, or don’t pray very often even in their mind and heart. But when they do He answers and they really do know it.
- Everyone receives the Lords help in every way that individual will accept it. For example, if a person responds to the guidance of the Spirit of Christ they will find the truth and accept it. They will then receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, and, if they live what they have learned, have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost.
- Everyone is treated equally. Over the course of the Pre-existence, Mortal Life, and the Spirit World every person has every chance, and receives all the help he/she will accept, in the process of becoming like our Father.
And when it is time to be resurrected and judged by the Lord we will all have been treated equally – and more by far than that, we will each one, everyone, ‘all men’, have received every help, all the help, that we would accept. If we fall short to any degree it will be because of our own choices, made in whatever manner we make them - there will be no place for blame. We will not feel to blame the Lord or any man, for we will then know that we were given every chance and every help that we would receive. All men, all women, all mankind, every individual, everywhere.
And now back to why I’m writing this – back to the first sentence or two. Is it possible for us to even imagine the wisdom and love required of the Lord to conceive a way for each one of us, as we deal with the challenges we each face, so that we will, each one, everyone, say, at the time of judgment: I was treated fairly, and I received all the help, every possible help, from the Lord that I would accept. I don’t have the ability to understand the depth of knowledge and feeling and wisdom, knowing myself, and my dealings with children and others, how He can always, every time, do all that can be done to help me and not, in mercy or tenderness, do too much for my good, or, in His desire to help me or in the need to teach me, do too little.
But I know He does just that. I know He has dealt with me that way. I have had every chance. I have been presented with every possible help. Sometimes I have chosen to receive His help, sometimes I have not. Some time ahead I will fall at His feet and weep – many tears of gratitude and joy for what He has done for me, and perhaps some tears of regret because I didn’t respond to His offers of help.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Talk up-front
Maybe nothing tells more about us than the way we speak. They may judge us by our appearance until we speak, then our appearance is muted, and we are as we speak.
We may have been told to enunciate, to talk slower, to speak clearly, to not run the words together, and so on. I now suggest, regardless who gave you the instruction, that you toss it away, forget it, ignore it - and let me give you a simple but magic rule that will remove the need for any further instruction or correction. You will be admired for how well you speak.
I will give you the rule in a few simple, uncluttered words. Learn the rule and apply it. Everything I say before I give you the rule is simply to help you know the importance of how you speak, and what I say after is to help you apply the rule.
The author of the book called this rule the "talk up-front" rule. The rule is this:
We may have been told to enunciate, to talk slower, to speak clearly, to not run the words together, and so on. I now suggest, regardless who gave you the instruction, that you toss it away, forget it, ignore it - and let me give you a simple but magic rule that will remove the need for any further instruction or correction. You will be admired for how well you speak.
I will give you the rule in a few simple, uncluttered words. Learn the rule and apply it. Everything I say before I give you the rule is simply to help you know the importance of how you speak, and what I say after is to help you apply the rule.
The author of the book called this rule the "talk up-front" rule. The rule is this:
- Form your words with your lips, your teeth, and the tip of your tongue.
- Feel your words being formed as you speak, right at the front of your mouth.
That's it. That's the rule. That's all. Don't expand on it. Practice this rule and forget everything else you know about how to speak well.
It will take some practice. But as you do, you will find that you are enunciating each syllable properly, you are speaking at the proper speed, you are forming each word and never "running words together", and all without focusing on any of that. And you won't sound like you're trying to speak better. You will sound very natural and as a well educated, sensible person would speak.
It's been years since I read the book. The idea is the only thing I remember. So it's one of those things that become your own after a time, and the words to explain it are also your own. I'm convinced it's all you need to know about speaking well.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Posture
When I was in the 9th grade, which was high school in our school district, we had a new family move into town. They had 3 sons, ages of about 4, 3 and 2 years my senior. I immediately liked them, especially the younger one. The two younger ones were a lot alike. They walked kind of slouched over with their hands in their pockets. I thought that looked cool, so I started doing it.
By the time I was later in my sophmore (10th) year of school I began feeling really bad about my posture. The farmer I worked for told me he'd like to tie a board to my back to straighten me up. The thing he didn't know was that I had been working on my posture for months, and I couldn't make any significant improvement. When I wasn't consciously thinking about it and working on it, I would return to the kind of slumped position.
Well, I worked on that for years. I still work on trying to have good posture, and I'm still very conscious of the effect that year of carelessness when I was a boy has had. One of the things I like about WII Fit is that they encourage and emphasize balance and posture, both of which are so very important to our health, participation in various activities (sports, dancing, etc), self confidence, etc.
I guess that was a very important lesson to me: be yourself, be your best self, adopt characteristics and habits that will help you do that - but don't copy foolish, damaging things that seem cool for a moment.
Years later I came across a book that had a very good chapter on posture, with a unique but wonderful suggestion for maintaining good posture. I think I taught it to all our kids. This is the suggestion:
1. Imagine you have a large, helium filled balloon tied to the top of your head, immediately in line with your spinal chord. The balloon is large enough that it almost lifts you off your feet, not quite, but it makes you very light on your feet. It makes it easier to walk up a flight of stairs, it stretches the muscles in your neck and seems to lengthen your neck. It stretches the muscles in your sides by your ribs, it makes you want to stand on your toes. Try it, let your imagination work, don't be skeptical or say, "that's foolishness".
2. Now, with the balloon in place and doing it's job, relax every muscle in your body. Don't worry, you won't collapse for the balloon is holding you straight up. Consciously relax your shoulders - feel them relax. Don't try and keep your shoulders back, just let them relax. Relax your arms, your stomach muscles, every muscle. As you relax, allow yourself to feel the pull of the balloon, lifting you almost off the ground.
3. When you are doing this well you have perfect posture. The shoulders are straight and in the right position (they won't take an un-naturally forced back position like we sometimes do when someone tells us to 'keep your shoulders back'), the stomach is pulled in just the right amount, you are light on your feet - relaxed and comfortable - nothing is forced.
4. If this is done consciously for a time it will become a habit - just like my bad posture habit. You'll find that, after a few times, when you picture the balloon tied to your head, your body immediately relaxes and you are in 'perfect posture' and balance.
I hope you'll try it. I think you'll find that it works.
By the time I was later in my sophmore (10th) year of school I began feeling really bad about my posture. The farmer I worked for told me he'd like to tie a board to my back to straighten me up. The thing he didn't know was that I had been working on my posture for months, and I couldn't make any significant improvement. When I wasn't consciously thinking about it and working on it, I would return to the kind of slumped position.
Well, I worked on that for years. I still work on trying to have good posture, and I'm still very conscious of the effect that year of carelessness when I was a boy has had. One of the things I like about WII Fit is that they encourage and emphasize balance and posture, both of which are so very important to our health, participation in various activities (sports, dancing, etc), self confidence, etc.
I guess that was a very important lesson to me: be yourself, be your best self, adopt characteristics and habits that will help you do that - but don't copy foolish, damaging things that seem cool for a moment.
Years later I came across a book that had a very good chapter on posture, with a unique but wonderful suggestion for maintaining good posture. I think I taught it to all our kids. This is the suggestion:
1. Imagine you have a large, helium filled balloon tied to the top of your head, immediately in line with your spinal chord. The balloon is large enough that it almost lifts you off your feet, not quite, but it makes you very light on your feet. It makes it easier to walk up a flight of stairs, it stretches the muscles in your neck and seems to lengthen your neck. It stretches the muscles in your sides by your ribs, it makes you want to stand on your toes. Try it, let your imagination work, don't be skeptical or say, "that's foolishness".
2. Now, with the balloon in place and doing it's job, relax every muscle in your body. Don't worry, you won't collapse for the balloon is holding you straight up. Consciously relax your shoulders - feel them relax. Don't try and keep your shoulders back, just let them relax. Relax your arms, your stomach muscles, every muscle. As you relax, allow yourself to feel the pull of the balloon, lifting you almost off the ground.
3. When you are doing this well you have perfect posture. The shoulders are straight and in the right position (they won't take an un-naturally forced back position like we sometimes do when someone tells us to 'keep your shoulders back'), the stomach is pulled in just the right amount, you are light on your feet - relaxed and comfortable - nothing is forced.
4. If this is done consciously for a time it will become a habit - just like my bad posture habit. You'll find that, after a few times, when you picture the balloon tied to your head, your body immediately relaxes and you are in 'perfect posture' and balance.
I hope you'll try it. I think you'll find that it works.
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